The Big Trap For Leaders

There is a massive trap in our pursuit of God. The enemy looks for any way to get in and turn what God meant for good to his own favor. As we pursue God in our early years, we dive deep to know Him and to grow in learning what it means to follow. As we step out, we grow in influence and authority. Throughout these stages, we see that the enemy will use pride in what we know, who we know, or what we do to taint the work God is doing in our lives. He may try to stop us from spending time in the Word and in prayer so that when we speak or teach, it lacks the punch it could have had.

​But I think the most subtle way the enemy attacks is in the later years of service and ministry, after we have weathered attacks from the outside. Paul says that we don’t wage war against people, but against spiritual authorities. As believers, we don’t expect the attack to come from within the flock. The one who has done ministry with you for years suddenly leaves you for someone else. The person you trust goes behind your back to get something approved. We go through these problems and heartaches, and we get hurt, offended, cynical, depressed, hopeless, skeptical, distant, and untrusting. The list of reactions could go on.

​But where do we go from here?

​Some brush it off, saying, “I am not hurt,” or “That didn’t affect me.” Everyone around you knows and can see that it did, but our pride to admit weakness yells louder. Or, we withdraw from the people around us, stop talking to friends, and hide away—hoping that isolation will heal the wounds and protect us from future attacks. Again, it does nothing of the sort. Maybe we respond in anger and explode at those around us because they didn’t do enough to stop it, or failed to warn us that this could happen. Yet, deep down, we know that would not have changed the hurt we feel.

​The thing is, we go through the hurt, and after a bit of time, we open up a little more and things return to "normal." We say normal, but it’s just more normal than the deep reactions we have just gone through. Everyone thinks we are past it, but what has really happened is that we have just covered over the pain. The wound underneath festers and bleeds. It gets poked and prodded by daily interactions that remind us of the event. Still, we pretend it has no effect—but it does.

​This is a call to deal with our hurt properly.

​When you get a deep physical wound, medical professionals have to inspect it to see what damage has been done. Even if you are a medical professional yourself, no good hospital will allow you to self-diagnose. You need a second opinion. Why are we in the church so afraid of a second opinion? Why do we fear counseling or therapy? Why do we say, “Oh no, not me”?

​Scripture says, "I cannot say to another part of the body, 'I have no need of you.'" Yet, by avoiding help, we reject Christian counselors and therapists who are equipped to walk us through healing and restoration. Paul didn’t exclude leaders when he wrote those words. He included them, because God desires a healthy bride. Can we get off our high horses before we get knocked off them? Can we say, "You know what? I need a second opinion"—and dare I say, someone outside the situation?

​So many times, we ask people for their opinion knowing exactly what advice they will give. They will never tell you that you are hurt or need help because of their own insecurities and struggles. They want to please you or avoid offending you. Let us be leaders who don't put people in that position.

​See, in the end, when we don’t get the help we need, we might still preach great sermons, have great revelations, and experience amazing encounters. Yet, it all gets slimed and tainted by our own bloody wounds. We bleed on those around us. Our interactions and teachings are tainted by the hurt that WE never dealt with. They begin to contain only "half-truths," because Jesus said when a student is fully trained, they will be like their master. Not like their master's teaching, but like the master themselves.

​So, if you want those who follow you to wallow in self-pity and hurt, and to ignore areas of offense and pain, then carry on. Keep raising up a zombie army that looks nothing like the Bride of Christ—but be ready for the response you will get when presenting them before Him.

​This is a call for health within leadership. Stop hiding your wounds; get a second opinion. Stop rejecting a part of the body that Christ has given you out of pride, shame, or embarrassment. Let's grow together to be the Bride Jesus is coming back for.